Increase in Quality of Life: 78.3%
Decrease in Chance of Burnt Mail: 100%
Decide to live with your friends this year? Want to stay friends? Not living with your friends and still want your roommate to not hate you? Do you have roommates? Did you say yes to one of those questions? No? Doesn’t matter cause this post is awesome and you want to read it anyways. Here’s 8 Step’s to being a less shitty roommate. Listen close newly moved out folk, this is for you.
#1) TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE
Seriously, its garbage. It gets stinky and very gross very fast. If its a bunch of mysterious Kleenex’s, maybe ask your roommate to do it instead.
#2) SHOW YOUR ROOMMATES SOME LOVE
Sometimes in our busy lives it can be easy to ignore the people that you live with, and we sometimes spend more time arguing over who ate who’s Cheerio’s then actually just hanging out. Leave the house, grab a beer (or pumpkin spice latte) and get some good time away from the house with them. The opposite can also happen, so if you find yourself spending too much time with this person, get outta thur or else they will get very annoying very fast.
#3) WEAR HEADPHONES WHEN LISTENING TO LOUD MUSIC/MOVIES AT NIGHT
An easy way to piss off your roommate is to watch the last season of Friends on full blast at 1 in the morning right before a big test. As hilarious as Ross is, I care about my sleep much more. On the other end of this, if you have a SO over, turn it up. No-one wants to hear the sex they’re not having.
#4) WASH YOUR DISHES
The last thing you want is for those dishes to pile up until you need a stool to grab them. No-one is gonna tackle that shit, the best thing is to wash them as soon as your done, or throw them in the dishwasher (if you have one).
#5) DON’T EAT YOUR ROOMMATES FOOD
I think this can be a) the most annoying and b) the most legitimately upsetting thing someone can do living with them. This might just be my opinion due to some mysteriously missing avocados the other day…. But seriously, this is stuff with an actual dollar value you’re stealing from someone. Not cool man…not cool.
#6) DON’T LEAVE SHIT ON THE FLOOR
Did you just eat a Mars Bar? Did you just throw that wrapper on the floor? Did you just get home? Did you just throw your dirty socks on the ground in front of the fridge (guilty)? Also grapes, I’ve dropped a lot of grapes. Don’t do this, clean it.
#7) FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, REPLACE THE TOILET PAPER
This doesn’t need any explanation. We’ve all been there, and it sucks. Don’t be that person.
#8) DON’T BURN YOUR ROOMMATES MAIL (UNLESS THEY DISREGARD EVERYTHING I’VE SAID)
Burning your roommates scholarship is a terrible thing to do, unforgivable even. But, according to the written law of Lithuania* you are allowed to burn your roommates mail if they don’t do the above activities. Good luck my friends.
*That was a lie
AND IF THAT WASN’T ENOUGH! Here is everything I just wrote but in HD video!!
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Have some crazy roommate stories? Have any other good tips for roommates? Share them below, and they could be featured in a future post!